Let's talk bodies.

DISCLAIMER: I'M GOING TO TALK ABOUT MY BODY TODAY.

Joined a gym, took a selfie. 

So last post I wrote about how I'm privileged, specifically talking about the subject of safety. I then decided to write about privilege on the weekly, since there's so many ways we Americans experience privilege. I spent most of this past week trying to pick a topic- the privilege of choice, education, holding a US passport, etc. And throughout this week, I also struggled to love my body. My decision has been made- I'm writing this more for me than for you. I need to see the value of my body, to recognize the privilege of health, the blessing of working limbs and eye balls and the ability to run and jump and carry things and stand on two feet and not be sick most of the year and not have to get dialysis and not have radiation and no daily pills and no chronic life long illness.

And yet, I struggle to see my body as a blessing. I can point to every flaw- the way my thighs rub together when I walk, the extra fluff around my stomach, the acne that will never ever go away. I wish I was thinner, stronger, taller, better.

But. I can't tell you the last time I was in the hospital due to crippling sickness. I maybe took 10 sick days in all of college (but probably one 4 of them were legit sick days, let's be honest). I haven't had so much as broken a bone. I'm healthy. Like, awesomely healthy.

My health isn't something I think of often. However, I stress about my weight, hypothesizing that happiness comes when those last 5 pounds are lost. I focus on my appearance, as if putting together the right outfit will suddenly silence all the negative thoughts surrounding my body image. I watch what I eat with this mindset that eating just one more green leaf will cause my body into looking the way I desire.

Why is it SO much easier to just focus on what is "wrong" with my body than realize the blessing of living with such a highly functioning machine?

In Bangkok, I've met a handful of individuals who have had TB (they aren't contagious, don't stress) who must see a doctor every day for their dose of medication. This affects their ability to move to America, to provide for their family, or even get out of bed. That's a struggle I won't have to undergo. I can afford healthcare, I have had all the required shots since being born, and a healthy immune system. This is a huge privilege. My body is AWESOME yet I spend most of my time criticizing it for not
looking the "right" way. Is there even a right way? Absolutely not, we're all unique little snowflakes.

So, I don't do this whole self-love thing well. I need to work on it. Recognizing my body and health as a privilege is a first step. Make sure you give yourself a hug today and thank your body for breathing lungs and a pumping heart and eyesight and nerve endings and hair follicles. Cause you're body is awesome and so are you.